Trade School

29 Mar

So suddenly I am struck with this paralyzing writer’s block. So paralyzing that I even just had to spend more than 30 seconds thinking of the phrase writer’s block! My brain is drained. Why do I care anyway, it isn’t like there are actually any people out there reading this junk is there?

Anyway I am just going to free-write and type whatever comes into my head:

I am a young mother at 39 I have 2 kids, or should I say adult’s in training who are ages 18 and 15. I have always thought of myself as the coolest mother on the planet. Hell, I ride motorcycles, have tattoos (and will likely get more) and I understand that kids are going to have sex, that they will drink alcohol and they will get into trouble. I know these things. I have had the “don’t drink and drive, I will come get you no matter where you are” conversation with them. I have tried to explain that they should be careful with what they put out there on the internet (how is THAT for irony) and that they should dress the way they want people to perceive them.

I have worked with #1 her whole life with teaching her how to study and how to try really hard. I have tried to shake up #2 and explain that he should be less lazy and put more care into what he does. (job doing well blah blah blah).

What is my point? Ok well here it is. I filled out the FAFSA today for #1’s jaunt into reality and it got us to talking with her about her future and what she really wants to do with it. She wants to go to art school in the city and sow her wild oats away from the house and who can blame her right? Since not only am I the coolest mother, I am also the hardest to pull one over on! SO we had this long conversation with her about how much $144,000 actually is. I guess I must suck but I am not paying a dime towards her college education. If I had it, I would pay it but along with being really frigging cool, I also was a single mother for a very long time and every dime I had went into putting a roof over their heads and food in their belly’s. I have nothing. I can throw her some money here or there but mostly it is going to have to be on her shoulders. Sadly, we make too much to get her any grants or financial aid but yet we don’t have any because the economy blows.

I wish that I could win the lottery and give her all she needs to pay for her education but that being said, I hope that having to raise the money herself will help her realize how much it means and perhaps value her education. Or maybe she will do keg stands, have sex with random boys and have puking contests like I did (thinking I am not as cool as I thought I was).  Maybe college is really there to teach you the fine art of turning a long standing string of mistakes into something positive lol.


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